Beware of Beauvarts
by Kelly McDowell
As published in the AOL Cat Forum Mewsletter
Suddenly, out of nowhere, racing at top speed, your cat whizzes by you in a blur of fur. He skids around a corner and you hear him jump on the counter as dishes and jars crash to the floor. Back he comes, straight at you and, at the last possible second, just as you think you are about to be turned into a pummel horse, he changes direction and almost flies up the stairs.
Then nothing. Silence.
You gingerly sneak up the stairs, expecting to find a raging tiger ready to pounce. He's not in the hall. He's not in the bathroom. He's not in the office. He's....he's....lying calmly on your bed looking at you as if to say, "So, what's up?"
He hasn't gone crazy. He doesn't need to see a vet. He has just rid your home of that dastardly creature, the Beauvart.
Beauvarts are small, furry animals that fly at super-sonic speeds three inches above any horizontal or semi-horizontal surface. Cats hate them. Only cats can see them. You are most likely to be afflicted with beauvarts if you own a Calico, Abyssinian, Siamese, or any kind of kitten. However, even Persians have been known to give wild chase on occasion. And Ragdolls or Maine Coons? Well, having a 20-pound cat chase a beauvart through the house is a truly exhilarating (and sometimes frightening) sight. But hey, after they're done, you don't have a beauvart problem until the next one sneaks in!
Our thanks to Kelly McDowell for allowing us to share her wonderful Beauvarts story!
Webmistress Bari DuBois